Watching adults grinning and acting silly trying to get me to smile or react in some way
only making me wonder how long I'd have to wait before I could do what I came to do
which was to help people.That I knew. How? maybe not yet. Speaking early, at 7months "Hi, Arch" to my neighbor across the small street..no one could believe it was me. but it was. (My own 8 month old son said" I stuck" when he was.Another old soul.)
By age four I had had a dream of my former self as an adult in Medford at Playstead Park and couldn't wait to tell my mother." Oh. Mommy, I just had the greatest dream..
I was me but I was me, grown up, like before,"..and she stopped me.."Honey, you can't have been grown up before you're only four now" she said nervously.her eyebrows knit together."Oh, this must be like sex." I thought.."I'll wait till its ok."..and never finished but luckily never forgot.It would be many years till I eventually wriggled out of the cacoon woven around me so neatly., sometimes thrashed way outside the parameters.
I would have told her the brook was wider, more trees no slide or swings ..If she hadn't cringed I wouldn't know it wasn't acceptable in our culture.I owe her and. I spent years resenting her. That's ok mine resent me, too.Its human nature.:)